Sunday, May 25, 2014


This is the first installment of my "Ten Commandments of Writing" series. Basically, each will be a set of ten rules/guidelines covering a specific genre or aspect of writing, based on some very good advice I've picked up from various sources. So follow my sacred laws, peasants, lest the wrathful God of the Written Word rain hellfire down upon you! (note: For all of you out there with no sense of humor, yes, this list is meant to be tongue-in-cheek, but it is still advice that I have found quite helpful)

The Ten Commandments of Narrative

  1. Thou shall not infodump on thy readers
  2. Thou shall knowest thine enemy, purple prose, so as to best avoid its temptations
  3. Honor the word "said" above superfluous dialogue tags
  4. Thou shall not permit thy plot to lose its focus
  5. Thou shall not pad out thy work with filler
  6. Thou shall properly utilize thy setting in service of thy story
  7. Keep holy the integrity of thy story, for it is not thy personal soapbox
  8. Thou shall have a plot that is coherent, and not a series of random happenings
  9. Thou shall not defile thy thesaurus
  10. Thou shall pay homage to the written word by continuing to practice thy craft
Like it? Love it? Hate it? Most of this was just stuff I came up with off the top of my head (based on advice I've heard elsewhere, of course). Feel free to share what your personal rules for writing are,  and let me know what you'd like me to do a list of "commandments" for next! ~Leanne

Monday, May 19, 2014

FSOG Review

For the lazy, here's my Fifty Shades of Grey review from Goodreads in full. Yeah yeah, I know I'm way behind on the times and everyone and their mother has reviewed this garbage already, but hey, I hadn't discovered Goodreads yet back when I first read it, ok? And since my opinion is the correct one, I must put it out there. Besides, the movie will (unbelievably) be out in less than a year, and I've got plenty more where this came from before then. So stay tuned for reviews for the next two literary abominations in this series, my lovelies! 


I read the entire trilogy. Why you ask? Because I get a twisted satisfaction out of reading and watching things in the "so bad it's good" category. Unfortunately, that only applies to certain parts of this drivel. Everything that wasn't laugh-out-loud hilarious managed to offend me on every possible level that I could be offended. These books are nothing but horrible trash, and I don't care if I piss off anybody by saying that.

My Goodreads Book Reviews!

I'm pretty new at the whole book review-thing, so I apologize (don't get used to these apologies, ok?) if this is a bit dryer than what you're expecting... well, except for FSOG, maybe.

Fifty Shades of Grey


The Swan Thieves

The Prophecy of the Stones

Saturday, May 17, 2014


Hey everyone! Welcome to my blog! I'm hoping I can share my love of writing, reading, movie-watching, and various nerdy hobbies with all of you!!!

Phew. Got that out of the way. Don't get too used to me being so bright and cheery; if you're expecting anything other than snide commentary, biting sarcasm, harsh reviews, foul language, and the occasional tongue-in-cheek satire, then I pose this question: what the fuck are you doing here?

But really, I hope those of you who did come here with the proper mindset enjoy what I have to offer in terms of humorous reviews, rants, and all things related to fiction and writing. I will do my utmost to live up to your most ridiculous expectations.